Thursday, September 4, 2014

How it Hurts

I am having this nervous attack again. It'll come all over me, in waves, during which my heart feels like it's being pinched, at regular interval. This happens whenever I confront my relationship, in a way to admit that there's something wrong with it. 

Things seem ok if I choose to be blissfully ignorant, but I do find myself brooding over the things he's done which hurt me, throughout the day. They hit me with sprouts of mild depressions every time I think. And I just cannot take my mind completely off these things, because le brain just switches to this mode whenever it's not occupied. Here am I having a relaxing holiday, so I have lots of time to spare, and lots of time to torture myself this way.

It is a wonder how another human being can inflict pain on you without having to whisper a word, or be physically near you. Because  you  can do the job entirely on your own, and the trigger lies within you. 

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