My mom not being with us was a major bonus. Because she was not a very nurturing or encouraging mom. Not having her around to scold us and dish out harsh words was really a strong boost to our self-confidence. Thinking about it now, I really love my time there. I was being myself, enjoying life and making friends without the slightest conscious effort- a task that feels almost impossible to me now. And I want to cure myself of this "inefficiency". I hate the feeling that there's something lacking in my life, I don't find many things satisfying, and the worse thing is, I often don't find my life satisfying.
I looked it up, keying in all the symptoms that I am feeling, into google. Google told me quite a few useful things:
1. There are many people out there, feeling out of place in social situations, just like me. this is reassuring :)
2. It also provides some possible explanations as to why I am the way I am.
Inborn nature - I was always very sensitive to my environment. I retrospect, as a kid I can recall faint memories of me feeling melancholic, or anxious about things.
What was I so anxious about? why was I constantly worrying? I want to know the answer. I think finding these answers would be the first step to cure myself. I want to be active, I want to live a care-free life, I want to be confident. But subconsciously, I also think it is impossible for me to get there. It seems so out of reach, it kills my spirits.
I think this is a good start to know myself better, and also to treat the problem. Right now I am learning to accept the fact that I have the tendency to feel awkward around people. I must also remind myself constantly, that I should not worry about it, or try to fix it.
The human brain is such a complicated thing. Mine especially. It is definitely configured in the weirdest way! whoever made it must have made a mistake somewhere! I am ultra sensitive, ultra conscious, think way too much, and worry a lot more.
Sorry this is sort of offtopic here, but I don't know where else to write to you. I'm writing you because I saw your profile on workaway, and I couldn't write you there; you had your blogspot URL though, so I decided to write you here.
ReplyDeleteHope it's not a problem :)
I'd like to ask you about your recent work experience (I won't say more in case you don't want that kind of information here).
Thank you very much ;)
Hello
DeleteSorry for this super late reply, my apologies. Do you have any specific questions? I don’t know where to start actually. Let me list down a few pros and cons to start with…
Pro 1) Accommodation was good, and the food too. I had a place with a host family whose child goes to the school. A few families are routinely volunteering themselves to host workawayers. Mine is great. I didn’t have to do any housework at all, but I chose to cook some Chinese dishes just to say thank you cuz they are really nice people. A workawayer I met was staying in a hotel owned by the host family, so she was eating everyday in the hotel’s restaurant, you can imagine it’s pretty cool
Pro 2) School wise, a good mix of activities. I got to sit in classes for their routine activities, arts and crafts lesson, English and free-work time (Freiarbeitzeit). Also got to plan and carry out a short English lesson and do some marking.
Con 1) Because the school is a Montessori school and I knew nothing about Montessori I had to spend a good deal of time learning about it. I was also feeling a little inadequate throughout cuz I wasn’t confident that I was approaching the kids the right way.
So yea, good luck!
Sorry for my super late replying, but this webpage doesn't tell you when someone is writing you back.
DeleteThank you very very much for the information. It seems I will go on september, I just don't know where I'm staying (the thing about the hotel sounds really nice :D, although I suppose living with a family also has good things).
I know a few things about montessori, not much. Since I'm a highschool teacher (and not primary teacher), and given the fact that Montessori Method is usually used in Primary (as far as I know), I'm not quite sure what to expect. But I'm willing to learn; surely it will be interesting.
Is it true that you work on a four day period per week? The house you stayed at, is it near of the school? I suppose in Geisenhausen there isn't much you can do. I hope my hosting family don't expect me to cook much, since I know how to make a few dishes but that's it :S
I'm sure you approached the kids the right way, San. The kids know the way to understand, it's something about the kid's nature. I'm not sure about how to explain it.
Thank you again. I will try to pay more attention to your webpage so you don't have to wait long for an answer :)
Take care!!
Hi there!
DeleteIt's nice to hear from you again, in the future you can write to me at saturday4sansan@gmail.com, so that we can reply to each other a little faster :))
Thanks for the encouraging words, I was just out of my comfort zone with new people and new environment, I'm like that, it makes me feel low for quite some time. Anw, thanks! ;) I'm sure you'll have it better.
Regarding your questions, the way they do it is, there are two options. You can choose to either work 4 hours a day and 5 days a week, or work 7 hours a day and 4 days a week (8am-4pm Mon-Thurs, Friday is free).
Most of the kids go home at 1pm. If they have extra curriculum activities then they go on till 4pm. That's why the workawayers' timetable is made accordingly.
There's one hour of lunch time and provided free by the school (food is yummy btw :D)
The house I stayed is not in Geisenhausen, but just 20 mins away. My host family drive us to the bus stop 5 mins from the house and from there we take school bus which takes another 15 mins or so.
Geisenhausen is quite small, but nice to walk around (the older students will give workawayers a walking tour around the school, just ask them:) they're very friendly). the major town is called Landshut which is 20 mins away, I'm sure your host family will bring you there without you even asking.
Yup hope it answers your questions!
Till next time then! Take care too :D